Grab The Tissues…
Let’s start with some facts:
My Cancerversary was 4 years ago: 10th Jan 2019
In that time, I’ve completed the following:
53 chemos
11 Immunotherapy Lenvatinib
11 chemos
3 weeks Regorafenib
5 rounds Lonsurf / Avastin
1 round Avastin / Tomudex
3 bone strengthening infusions
SIRT – direct radiation into my liver
2 surgeries to remove ovaries
Colonoscopy & Sigmoidoscopy
Total: approx 85 rounds of treatment in 4 years.
By the lack of blogs I did last year, you might think I’ve been doing great! Just look at my insta page.. Pictures of travelling, seeing friends, and happy smiles. While I did all of those things, it was done during the hardest year of my life.
I went through 5 different treatment options. Immunotherapy, chemotherapy, SIRT radiation to my liver, and two different types of targeted therapies. Throw in a colonoscopy, having to shave my head, somehow getting crush fractures in my spine, needing to use a wheelchair and so many abdominal fluid drains that I can’t keep count, and you can start to understand why 2022 was so hard on me.
As always, my nearest and dearest were there with me every single day. From visits to daily “just checking in” messages, sending care packages, and letting me be as honest as I can even though it upsets them. Sorry to those of you who I’ve made cry with my honesty. It means I consider you a true friend and trustworthy of my feelings. And I thank you all for that endlessly.
In August 2021, I was told by my then oncologist, “There’s nothing more we can do for you. We can try one more drug, but it most likely won’t work. ” I wasn’t ready to hear those words, so I found a new oncologist who could offer me other options. And I jumped at the chance to have more options and more time living! I’m so glad that I made that move as it’s given me 18 months more than I’d previously had.
This is important to understand as we have been living scan to scan, not knowing what the future would hold when we had our dreaded scan review appointments. This past year, none of my scans have been good. Some have been relatively stable, some showed great results in one spot but not in others, and one showed a huge increase in tumours in new organs. That was my most recent scan…
Very few people know exactly what Anthony & I have been dealing with. Especially in the past few months. Going into oncologist appointments after crying in the car the whole way there. But unfortunately, more often, crying in the car after the appointments. Not knowing what the future would hold for me. Or wondering, “Is this the last treatment option for me?”
Well, I don’t have to wonder anymore…
This past year, my blood tumour markers have been slowly increasing. To the point where I didn’t want to know what they were anymore. They were my guide as to how treatment was going, so if they went up, it meant that the cancer was spreading. It was one of the first times I felt like I was putting my head in the sand and pretending everything was going to be OK.
Recently, my oncologist asked me if I wanted to continue with treatment. There comes a time when you have to weigh up quality over quantity of life. And that was the first time I’d really had to ask myself that question. Is it worth it anymore?
I’d always said that as long as there is a treatment option available to try, then I’m still going to take that over stopping treatment altogether. But to be asked this twice in only a few weeks was a really big reality check for Anthony & I. And it hit us hard. Really hard.
To be able to see my entire family at Christmas was so wonderful. But the whole time, I was just thinking, this is most likely my last Christmas… That’s a really tough thing to be thinking while also trying to enjoy and create memories. And even worse was that I didn’t have the heart to tell anybody. I didn’t want to ruin Christmas, I wanted to be in the moment and for everyone to have a wonderful time together. Which I think we did! But I know it was a shock to see me looking so frail and getting around in a wheelchair. Even though the wheelchair is required for my back fractures, not directly cancer related, it still makes me look quite frail and unwell as I’ve lost so much muscle mass due to the fractures. Now, when I look in the mirror, I see a frail, skinny, sick person. Which is extremely scary.
This blog has at times been therapeutic to write, but this one will also be my last to write. Please know, that I’ve read every comment on my blog, every message on social media (even if I’ve forgotten to reply) and I appreciate all the support I’ve had from family, friends and even people who were initially internet strangers to me. Sometimes, those people are the ones I confided in the most as they have/are going through similar situations themselves or with their loved ones. I thank you so much for being so willing to share your good times and bad times and let me ask questions and advice many a time.
Sadly, by making cancer friends, you can also lose them too. So this post is dedicated to Nicole, Dean, Megy & Dame Deborah. I can honestly say that if it weren’t for Nicole, I wouldn’t still be here. She was generous with her advice and put me onto her oncologist, who has now been my oncologist for the past 18 months. 18 months since I heard those dreaded words from Peter Mac… I can not thank Nicole enough for everything she has done for me. I’m forever in debt to her and just hope she knew how much of a positive influence she was for me. Her amazing patient advocacy work will live on through all the lives she touched. I’d also like to acknowledge Jess for her unwavering support even when she was caring for Dean and having rough times herself. She’s a beautiful soul with so much love and compassion for others. I’m so glad our paths connected & I’m lucky enough to call her my friend.
I’ve written this blog from my hospital room. I’ve been an inpatient for 6 days due to a bowel obstruction. After an x-ray & CT confirmed it. This is extremely painful and uncomfortable as my stomach is quite distended and hard. It also meant it was slightly more dangerous to have my abdominal fluid drains done, which then made my stomach even harder and larger. So I was told ‘nil by mouth’, which meant no food or drinks for what ended up being 48 hours. I was, however, able to have some ice chips to suck on, purely to keep my mouth hydrated. It was a very difficult 48 hours and included finally being able to have a fluid drain. I ended up having two drains in as many days, with nearly 5 litres of fluid drained. 5 litres equates to approximately 5 kgs, so between that & no food for 2 days, I’ve lost even more weight. And I’ll most likely be back for another drain in a few days’ time, as it is just accumulating so quickly.
When I was admitted, I had quite a lot of fluid/swelling of my left leg & foot. I asked for an ultrasound to check it out, and they found an extensive blood clot in my upper leg/groin area. Thankfully, my leg isn’t giving me too many issues – apart from not fitting into my shoes – but it means I’m now on blood thinners. And I’d already been taking about 22 tablets per day… just another thing to add to my never-ending medical issues at the moment.
I’ve also been struggling with a high resting HR. Sometimes, it can be 130bpm when I’m sitting on the couch completely still. This is exhausting as my body thinks I’m out exercising, but I’m actually doing nothing at all. Since being in hospital, it has dropped a bit, which is great, but my blood pressure has also dropped a lot, which is of concern too. There’s so much to think about and juggle around to try and find the right balance for me in terms of managing all of these things at home.
I don’t write all these things in here to scare you. Rather, I’m trying to follow Nicole’s footsteps and be completely honest about the day to day life of someone managing the harsh reality of living with stage 4 bowel cancer. It never stops. It constantly gets harder to deal with, and when treatment options run out, that’s it. The clock starts ticking down. A lot of us don’t get a choice to keep fighting because we have tried everything possibly available to us, and at some point, the disease progresses more & treatment stops working. It’s the scariest thing I’ve ever faced – not knowing how long I’ve got left…
Once again, I want to thank you all for the support and love you have shown to myself & Anthony over the past 4 years. We got to know who our true friends are and went on some amazing adventures with you. But most of all, to those who were happy to come visit even if it meant you might have ended up watching me nap during the day due to pure exhaustion, or help me walk around after I’d had intense back fractures. Those people hold a special place in my heart.
This is not goodbye, was the line I had written here just a few days ago. However, as I mentioned, things can change quite quickly, and sadly they have changed for me.
So this IS goodbye from me…
My amazing oncologist did everything in his power to keep me alive and well for much longer than we expected, so we need to be grateful for the extra 18months I’ve just had. Especially when my original prognosis was 6 months. But when you are told there are days, maybe weeks left, that’s when reality sets in… Although I plan to stick around as long as my body allows me to. I want to create more happy memories and not spend my final days being sad and upset.
I hope this helps you re-evaluate your own life. If something in your body doesn’t feel right, get checked & push for answers, even if you’re told, “You’re too young.” Don’t wait for a special occasion, go on that holiday now, eat at fancy restaurants, make more of an effort to spend time with those you love and most importantly, tell them you love them. Hug them tight and do what makes you happy. Otherwise, what’s the point of living? You’re just existing. Be grateful for every single day, as you never know if it could be your last.
As previously mentioned, I read every single message and comment I receive. Know that even if I don’t reply, I truly appreciate you reaching out. Please allow Anthony & I to continue like this and give us our space as we navigate our final times together…
As much as I’d love to be able to see you all in person, I know that it may be difficult for some of you to see me in my most vulnerable state – and that’s ok. There’s no guide book as to best handle this situation. You may prefer to remember me in happier circumstances, and that’s perfectly fine with me. I will not be offended at all. I also may not have the energy for visitors either. As lovely as it is to see friends and family, it’s quite exhausting for me. And I want to be able to feel as well as I can and enjoy quality time with everyone I see. So please don’t take it personally if I say I’m not up for visitors. I will do my best to see my nearest and dearest in my own time.
Now for my final comment…
Anthony, you have been by my side every single day throughout this. I probably haven’t said it enough, but you are my rock, and I honestly couldn’t have done it without you. I can only imagine how hard it is to see your wife / best friend so unwell and know that there’s nothing you can personally do to fix it. But you never wavered. You’ve done so much for me physically as well as emotionally. You always try to “chirp me up” by putting on fun music & silly dancing for me, and by making me pose like “the dish” every chance you get! You are my most favourite person in the world and I’m so glad that 14 year old Keely chose you to spend her life with. We never chose this particular path in life, but I can not imagine being supported and loved more deeply by anyone else but you. I love you with all of my heart.
xoxo Keely
Below is a link to donate to the amazing ‘Love Your Sister’ charity to help vankwish cancer. Please consider donating if you can. It would be so appreciated.
https://www.mycause.com.au/page/303377/keelys-positive-party
Comments
Oh Keely, may the time you have left be comfortable & free from pain. Rest easy now knowing you are so so loved by all your family and friends. Thinking of you and Anthony at this hard time.
We love u Keely. You have done SO well and accomplished SO much since diagnosis.
You’re a fucking diamond and don’t worry we’ll take care of your boy xx
Keely, I’ve known you since you were born. Meeting your mumma when we were 15. I know how valuable long term friendships are. You are so very blessed to have met the love of your life at 14 years young. It’s been an amazing love story.
Your health journey & challenges have been both heartbreaking and inspirational xo
You’ve shown tremendous strength and grace while going through the most difficult of times. Yet you remained positive and have indeed created many more wonderful memories both for yourself and for your family.
Your smile shows a true warrior spirit.
In your C journey you’ve shown many how to live xo
Be proud of this, your legacy you leave each of us. A reminder to life life to the fullest.
You are one special little lady.
Hat’s off to your adoring hubby. You’ve both been blessed with marrying your best friend. The devotion you two have for one another is endearing.
Cherished moments and memories.
You’ve fought an amazing battle.
Lors of love & support.
Fiona and family xoxo
Ps love to your mum xoxoxoxo
When Cliff and I met you in the Philippines many years ago ,you and Anthony were so sweet and friendly….we are so grateful to have spent some of our holidays with such a beautiful soul….thank you …. sending love and hugs….you both will always be in our hearts ….💞💞
Oh Keely, you are so brave. Glad you said get the tissues as this is exactly what I had to get!! You have been inspirational to so many with how you just kept fighting and making sure life was there to be had. I am heartbroken that this is now not the answer for you anymore. I know you will enjoy every day you have with your amazing and supporting husband and family , thank you for allowing us to follow your journey on here I am grateful as I am sure some days would have been so hard. Your smile is big and I know you will always have this wherever the next journey takes you. You are amazing and beautiful, I do hope I get to see you, but know time with family is so precious right now. Sending so much love your way. Nic
You are the bravest person I know. I love you so much. We will take care of Anthony Keely. 🤍
🤧😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧
You’ve changed my whole life in the BEST way possible, and I’m so grateful to call you one of my closest friends ever ever. We will always cherish our amazing times we spent together and feel so honoured and proud that you trusted us to go through “happiness to misery to here” with you, uh huh uh huh! We are the Dream Team and we love you forever
You are absolutely incredible Keely. No words to describe what I just read other than heartbreak. A true fighter with serious class. Sending lots of love ❤️
Dear Keely,
Sending you love and light on your journey. Thankyou for sharing everything.
Bless your beautiful heart ❤️
Super proud of you, so inspiring & have put life into perspective of what really matters.
We love you to the moon & back ❤️❤️❤️❤️
YOU ARE AMAZING!!
You are amazing and so unbelievably strong Keely!! Thank you for sharing your story with everyone and sorry the story finishes like this!
You will never be forgotten… ever! The few fun nights out will stay with me in my memories!! Also, you and Anthony have always been couple goals ❤️
Love you and I hope you are as comfortable as possible xx
Reading your blog pulls at my heart stings You are a very strong and positive person Your family and friends are very fortunate to have you in their lives. I can’t begin to realise how hard this be has been for you and your family. Keely you are a beautiful kind person inside and out. I have very fond memories of you thanks I for sharing your journey. Love Sibylle❤️❤️❤️❤️
Oh Keely, you have been such an inspiration and have fought so hard. I shed many tears reading this as you hold a special place in my heart and always will. I love you to bits and am glad even though the last 12 months has been hard you have made the most of the time surrounded by your closest and still trying to have as much fun as possible in your situation. I have a picture of you me and Jordan hanging above my desk and it’s always there. I think of you every time I look at it and think how brave and inspirational you are. Please know you mean the world to me and all our memories of us dancing together and your achievements will be happy ones and never forgotten. I cherish that you read at my wedding and am so privileged to be a part of your life.
I hope you can enjoy being with your amazing family and of course Anthony who you met back when I was teaching you at EDA, he is still the amazing boyfriend/husband and rock he has always been. You definitely found your knight in shining armour!!!
Love you Keely take care and do whatever it is you feel up for even if it’s eating a tin of milo I’ll support you!
😘❤️❤️❤️
You warned me that this was coming and I promised I would read it. It is what I expected and it was so hard to read. You grabbed life and really lived it. You travelled the world and experienced so much. Your wedding gave me wedding envy lol and your organisation skills to have your travel photos made into photo books left me with travel envy lol. I am proud we raised money to represent you at the Relay for Life and was also in awe when you came with your wonderful family and participated. You then most recently set me up for success with my current job. I cannot express how much your friendship over the last 10 (yep coming up to 10years!!!) has meant to me. You are a shining light, who lit the room up when you entered. I loved working with you, watching you cut your apples lol to having lunch on the couch together… I loved being your friend. Thank you for the good times my gorgeous girl. Forever grateful that we crossed paths and I will never forget you xx
Lots of love to you both you are an incredible person! Thankyou for all the people you’ve helped along the way enjoy the time you have left
Lots of Love
Alex
Keely our thoughts and prayers are with you and Anthony David and I loved seeing your smiling face coming down the Hydro ramp at YAWA that day and chatting to you! May God bless you Love Sobby
Keely, you are honestly one incredible lady!
I know how hard it would have been to share all of this with us but I’m so glad you did, I have read all of your posts and blogs and think of you often, I still remember you as a gorgeous young girl dancing around in an airport west studio (with the most amazing smile) and my goodness what a remarkable woman you have grown to be! …even through everything, that amazing smile is still there! So so proud of you Keely.
Sending the biggest hugs I can give,
Dalena
So much love to you both! I’m so sorry the prognosis wasn’t what you were expecting it to be I will always remember playing with you and Jordan at aunty Lucy’s when we were kids! Going to miss you even if we haven’t kept in touch I have been watching your journey and hoping for the best
Ohhh my gorgeous ‘Princess Warrior’ Keely ❤
You have fought so bloody hard, all the while with a beautiful glowing smile on your face and your darling husband by your side.
The thought of goodbye none of us will ever be ready for, we are so grateful for the extra time the amazing doctors were able to give us.
Thank you for allowing me be your aunt, I will be eternally grateful and fortunate for being granted that role.
Thank you for all your help, support and love during my journey with cancer, all the while dealing with your own Cancer challenges and battles.
You are such a selfless human!
I love you so much, so for me, it’s not goodbye, rather, until we meet again my darling niece.
Love always Aunty Sheree ❤
thank you, keely. i doubt you remember me, but i certainly remember you. the last time we saw each other was at zio johns house, and we were all playing outside. i told you i loved your short hair and you said you wished you had my long hair. at that time i had no idea you had cancer. in fact, i didn’t find out till months after when i came across your blog page.
i don’t know why, but that memory is constantly coming up in my life, as if it is floating around in the back of my mind constantly. i don’t remember your face very well, or exactly what your hair looked like, or what you were wearing (although i’m 90% sure it was a yellow dress). i often find that i have less than reliable memory, so again it’s very weird that i remembered this interaction. the one thing i can recall so clearly is you beautiful, glowing smile. in that moment, i felt so appreciated and loved. i could feel the goodness of your heart radiating through my skin, touching my own heart in such a way that it was changed.
reading your latest blog did in fact make me cry proper tears and look like a tad bit crazy (potentially because of the mascara i was experimenting with today but also because of how strongly i feel towards your words).
i’m not sure what your personal beliefs are, but i know for a fact that if there is an afterlife (i believe very strongly in God and the heaven that waits above for me once i pass away, for context), you have a grand throne waiting for you. the powerful impact you have left on me through one small interaction is so profound, so i can hardly imagine how your smile has changed others hearts. i truly believe that some of the best people have to suffer the most because they are too pure for this world, and deserve to be happy and at peace.
keely, thank you. thank you for your persistence and inspiration. despite small, our initial meeting has made a very very big impact on a little 11 year old girl. my current 13 year old self is so proud of you (i’m not really sure how qualified i am to say that, but it’s true) and i’m so grateful for not only meeting you but for the energy and time you used writing this blog. not only have you made me look at the beauty we call life with a much higher appreciation once, i can confidently say it’s happened again.
thank you so much for being a trooper, for being the strong and inspiring woman that you are. your kindness and happy spirit will not be forgotten.
i don’t think my words properly conveyed exactly how i feel, but i think it was effective enough to get the message across. i don’t know you, keely, in terms of your little quirks and the silly things that make you laugh. but i do know your smile and i got a small taste of your pure heart. so yes, i love you keely. i pray that you have a peaceful send off and rest easy knowing that your beloved family and friends and anthony are always thinking of you.
take it easy my love, i will see your beautiful smile again.
much love and a big hug,
siena.
Keely you are such a strong woman. I so admire your fight to stay alive and your will to never give up. I’m so sorry for what you have been through the last 4 years. I thank you for being you and for loving Anthony as strongly as you have since you were both 14. We all love you here in the Taranto household. Xx❤️
Keely – I may be across the pond, but you have touched my life in more ways than you will ever know. Thank you for being strong enough to articulate the hardest emotions and feelings one will ever have to experience. You are a special human that I am lucky to have crossed paths with, even if only for a day. Love to you and Anthony all the way from a very special place – Key West
Gah, Keely! Pass the tissues, indeed! Thank you for opening this blog – it’s been a really forthright and transparent window into your life over the last four years. The way that you have taken each situation with such courage and grace is completely inspiring. I hope you know that, even though we’ve probably only actually crossed paths a couple of dozen times in life, all those times have been better for having big had you there – from hanging out at Oktoberfest, to some of the parties at Airport West, to seeing you at Hoz and Anna’s wedding last month. Thanks for hanging in there – you’re awesome and it’s been a gift to have known you.
Love you keelz! I hope you truely know how inspirational and amazing you truely are. Thankyou for just being you and still being such an amazing friend and support to sooooo many of us even though you were fighting so many battles yourself. We promise to look after and be there for Anthony. Love you to the moon and back chickee xxxx forever
I will always cherish our younger memories we had together.
You touched my life in so many ways.
Thank you for being my best friend as a silly teenager when I needed it the most.
Xx
Keely I have known you since you Marra and Michael started High school together, driving you home from school in the back seat of the little read car with you and Marra kissing and cuddling. Your strength has amazed me the way you have never given up even when there were really dark days , Remember one day at a time, Sending all my love to you and Marra with love from Mazz and Michael snr xxxx
Kelly you have always been in my thoughts and prayers. You are such an inspiration. May your time with Anthony and your beautiful family be truly wonderful. My thoughts are with you all. take Care beautiful lady. 💕💕💕💕
Whilst I have never met you – related via your Mum – your strength and determination to beat this horrible disease has been amazing as is your love and compassion for others. I send love and healing for your next journey. Grow your angel wings and fly free – free from pain, free from fighting this terrible disease, free from treatment, free from the wheelchair. Know that you won’t be alone, there are others waiting to wrap their arms around you xxxx
Keely – You are truly an inspiration to Anthony, your Mother Maria and family members.
After losing our sister Jayne some 8 weeks ago to cancer, you are right in saying to live every day to the fullest.
The strength you have shown over the past 4 years has been nothing less than amazing.
Thinking of you always
Brendan and your Gran Maisey
Don’t be frightened of the road ahead Keels you’ve earned front row seats with the best of them already there waiting for you! I have no doubt that Nicole, Dean, Megy and Damn Deborah will be first in line to give you hugs & kisses!
What a bloody soldier you have been and for me personally an absolute idol-role model for fighting the C..! I will tell your story to as many fighters as I have the privilege of meeting!!!! And 1 day (I plan on it being a longggggggg way down the track 🙏) we will meet again! God Bless Keels 💕
Hi Keely, I have followed your blog since you became ill. You dont know me, but I worked with your Mum for a short time many years ago. If only positivity were a cure, because that is what you been throughout all this. You are such an amazing person and your blog has had an incredible impact on myself and so many others. Thank you for sharing such a personal account of your journey, your family will truly be proud of your exceptional strength. I wish there were more words to say, but fly high on the other side….
Keely I don’t think we have ever met, but I have been a friend to your mum since we met at the Bank in Avondale Heights. I have come to know you as your mum always talks about her girls, when we catch up. These past few years have seen you fight so hard with Anthony and your family supporting you. You are a brave, courageous, beautiful inside and out young lady and you deserve so much more. Take care dear Keely xx
Keely the strength and dignity you have shown during your illness has just been amazing. It has been an inspiration reading your blogs, and I only hope that when my time comes I can be as strong as you. Make beautiful memories with Anthony and may God hold you in his loving arms 💕
Fly high and free Keely. Sending you all our love. Thank you for sharing your bravery and story. May you be blessed and know that you continue to inspire me and every person in life that has been lucky to share this journey with you.
You are so loved Keely, by so many. Your bravery, positive outlook and fighting spirit are so inspirational to us all.
Sending love to you Keely. An amazingly tough journey and you still manage to feel and care so much for those around you and how this impacts them. Incredible. May you be as close to your closest for as long as you can. With love xoxo
I am so glad I got to meet you Keely and you trusted me to read for you and do a reiki session at the very beginning of your treatment. Sending you and your family so much love.
Clair Hill xx
Keely and Anthony – my daughter Emma passed away in April 2017, aged 25, from melanoma. Emma was a sister, a wife and a beautiful friend to many. Like you she shared her journey through her blog, ‘Dear Melanoma’. My heart breaks for you, Anthony and your family. No one should have to succumb to this battle with cancer but someone so young who will not experience all those wonderful life experiences is so wrong.
Rest easy knowing the strong love you share with your husband and family. xx
Keeley, your beautiful honest writing has brought me to tears. It has been so long since I’ve seen you but can picture your joyful smiling face so easily and recall happy times spent together in our youth.
Sending so much love and strength to you and Marra.
May this time be one of peace and love for you.
Jussy xxxxx
Thank you for being brave enough to share your story. Reminding us what is important, truly important. Your journey is not as you planned, but you can teach people more in a short time as in a long time. I want to thank you for that gift. My best friend Beth left us about ten years ago, facing similar challenges and showing similar bravery. You would have definitely got along. Sending you lots of love and strength.
Keely
My best friend passed 5 years ago this year from cancer
I can assure you you don’t leave, we just feel you in different ways. A piece of my heart went with her, as I’m sure your Anthony’s will with you
Don’t be scared: go peacefully and happily. Reading your story tonight made me think of my BFF who went before you
Go well warrior woman
Dear Keeley, you’re a courageous woman and you and Anthony are in my thoughts. I’m sorry that this has been your path. I have followed your journey in the background and how you have handled it with grace and honesty, and with the support of so many loved ones, is clearly a testament to the kind of person you must be. Go well, lovely.
Keeley, the world is a better place for having you in it. I remember little 16 year old me coming to my first shift at Paul Sadler and you being there and just immediately making me feel welcome. You are such a warm and bright person and I always looked forward to shifts with you. I feel honoured for having met you. You are such a strong and courageous women and I wish you all the love and strength in the world xxx
May all of your moments be precious and cherished by those you chose to share them with.
You will be forever be remembered as the beautiful, fun young lady you are.
Much love to you Anthony and your extended family.
Dear Keely and Anthony,
I saw your story on the Love Your Sister fb page earlier today and made a donation. Tonight I have just checked how it’s gone and was so full of joy to see that you have smashed your goal and done such an amazing thing today. Congratulations!!
My beautiful fiancée Rohan passed away from bowel cancer 20 months ago. I feel your pain and I know how terrible and devastating it is. I know the powerlessness and the fear but I also know the joy that happens amongst it all.
I know you must be so scared of saying goodbye, but let me tell you from experience it is not the end. You will be together forever… and Anthony, you will feel Keely and ‘see’ her everywhere you go.
I can’t see Rohan in person any more… but he sends me signs every day that tell me he’s here. A lot of our signs are to do with birds and feathers. I have found the most amazing colourful feathers in all sorts of different places since he’s been gone. Just last week he sent me TWO cockatoo crest feathers within 2 minutes of each other on a walk at the park. He still talks to me…just not the same way. Knowing that he’s near me and knowing he is sending me all these beautiful little messages gives me so much peace. I don’t have to be sad all the time. He is free from pain and still by my side, watching over me and waiting for me.
I wish you both so much love for the tough journey ahead. Keely, you can be so proud of what you have achieved today. It truly is incredible. I wish you love, peace and freedom from pain. Anthony you have loved and supported her so well. I wish you all the strength and support you need to get through this next hard part… plus a lifetime of magical signs to show you Keely is near.
Thinking of you both with lots of love.
Sal xoxox
Keely, I am glad to have come across your story after no contact for many many years. I always enjoyed our chats and working with you back in our EKLC days! Your story is inspiring and heart breaking! I am so glad you have had time with your family and friends and I know your strength is something people will hold dear to them!
Xx
Oh Keelz, what a shit thing this C is. I was just looking through our dance USA photos the other day and admiring the way your smile shone through – so genuine and gorgeous. Sending you the biggest squeezy hugs wrapped in mounds of love xxxx
Sending you love and positive vibes from New Zealand. I have never met you but happened upon your blog via the Love Your Sister Facebook page who shared your fundraising page. I wanted to contribute and I so read your story.
Your writing and humour and honesty and courage has both inspired me, and made me absolutely bawl. I wish I had met you as you are one very special person – and very funny!
I love how clearly your describe the importance of your husband, family and friends throughout all of this. Most recently, I lost a dear friend to brain cancer only a couple of moths ago – just over a year from diagnosis. We did the same thing – kept having as many experiences with him and his wife & kids as we could – happy times and memories for us all that will last forever. I’m so heartened to read how you have been surrounded by people who adore you – and whom you love dearly.
I just checked your My Cause page again and you have over $75,000 raised!! What a legacy!
Thank you for sharing cancer experience in such a transparent way. It has touched us all.
Wishing you nothing but peace and love from across the Tasman. xxx
Sending you so much love, Keely – just to add to the piles of it that evidently surrounds you! I’m so sad to hear this news but I’m in absolute awe of how you have carried yourself. You’re incredibly generous in your story telling. Thank you for your impact. I remember dance classes with you so fondly. You were such an encouraging, fun, supportive and inclusive teacher which was so important at what was such a formative time for so many of us!! I remember the way you spoke so warmly of Anthony even as a teenager and it’s incredible to see the love story that continued to bloom! A lot has changed since then, but some things don’t such as your brilliant smile, your wondferfully kind nature and the way I have been able to look up to you. Thank you for being you!! The world is a better place for it! x
Keely, you write so beautifully. Peace and love to you from a Villager.
Keely, I have never had the honour or privilege of meeting you. Two of my sons spent time with you and Anthony in Brazil for the Football World Cup.
You are an amazing person who even in the times of such sadness still manages to thinks of others. Such dignity and class!
Tonight I have joined many others and made a donation to your fundraiser. I lost my dad (William Radford) many years ago to bowel and liver cancer.
You are an inspiration to many!!
Hello, Keely and Marra.
You both have incredible strength. Cam and I have been thinking about you both throughout your journey.
Your experience has been both inspiring and heartbreaking.
Sending all our love
Cam and Mel
Beautiful and brave. Had a lot of fun in our early years of high school. May God Bless you and your family. ❤️
You’re in my thoughts. Sending love ❤️
I’ve only known of you for a few days since Sam’s post on Love Your Sister. Your strength and spirit is incredible. Thinking of you Keely & Anthony and your family
Keely and Anthony,
I didn’t get to know you for very long – but in the time we have worked together I have been amazed by your strength, pragmatism, outlook and stoicism. And Keely, I’ve loved our rambling chats in the clinic about all things food, travel, life and love.
I can only imagine how crazy and scary it must be for you both to be navigating these times.
Sending you love, peace and whatever else you need as you find your way.
xoxo